Keith Pascal's Confidence Builders

I understand the feeling of fear in a fight. I used to freeze every time someone pulled a 'macho routine' on me at school.

So, how come I no longer feel the same level of body-numbing fear? What's the secret?

I think it boils down some of the factors in my martial arts classes with Steve Golden (orignal Ed Parker student and Bruce Lee student) and also some events that have happened since his classes.

1. Just about everyone in the class was a black belt -- except me. And they were 'a little rough' when they trained. I realized that I was dealing with much better fighters twice a week, than I would ever face at school or at a mall.

Call this overtraining. Can you find a training situation that requires more skill than you'd need in a real fight?

2. I worked out twice a week. I got to class at 6:30 pm, and often stayed until 10:00 pm. Plus I practiced about 5 hours a week outside of class, at the time. I was putting a dozen hours a week into training. My body was learning to react automatically. And I realized i had more training than most of the meanies I might encounter.

Can you find a situation where you train every week? If so, you'll never feel rusty. Instead, you'll be prepared.

3. The other martial arts schools focused on sparring. After I learned why the sparring distance was a fake distance and not good for timing, I learned that Steve Golden made sure all of our training was practiced at a realistic, fighting distance.

The closer your reality training is to ... uh ... reality, the better. If you practice for self defense, you will be better at self defense. Just be sure to make it realistic.

4. I was taught some devastating moves. I learned that name calling and minor threats were not reasons enough to poke someone's eyes out. With these skills came responsibility -- to avoid using them.

If you can learn to avoid a fight, so as not to hurt someone, then the knowledge of your skill and power goes a long way toward confidence building.

5. I could no longer "chicken out." If the fight was so serious that I couldn't avoid it, then I had to defend myself quickly, efficiently, and sometimes a little brutally. Anything less than a real threat to my well-being, and I backed down. I never thought of myself as "chicken." I avoided a fight, as I had been taught.

This may sound strange, but the calmness of knowing that you aren't going to fight will help you project an image of someone who doesn't involve himself or herself in such "base" behaviors.

6. I had 'brief exposures' to see if this stuff worked. I had football players resisting me breaking up fights, when I taught on the Coast. I also seemed to play martial arts a lot with people who had something to prove. I wanted to share -- they wanted to tear off heads and take no prisoners. So, I had to strut my stuff, to protect my neck in what I thought were sharing environments. 

And while I did prove that I do a practical form of martial arts, I felt something was lost, when I was forced into taking control of the situation.

Conclusion